Current mood: contemplative
Today I was reading a book called, "Deeper Experiences of Famous Christians" by James Gilchrist Lawson.
What was striking to me is the difference on how Guyon in her time saw suffering compared to our own time. Her response was rather consistently in suffering to turn to God. I spent a good part of the day considering her response in almost every hardship was to turn with trust to God. I tend to just get angry with God when things do not work out the way I want them to...
Job seems like a trajic story. It is our story. We all will live into it. The loss of everything. Time will eat away at our lives. In Romans 8 it says that God gave the whole of our creation over to decay... So In time we will even have to pass through death's door ourselves. Not everyone gets the chance to wrestle with God. To question him about what in the world is this all about? And to hear God's answer, "These matters are to great for you to fully understand... Did you see when I did X, Y, or Z???"
The difference between many that are great in faith and the rest of us...
is their ability to say "Naked came I into this world and Naked shall I return from where I came." No of us called ourselves into exsistence. The difference is a core trust that whether in Life or Death we belong to God.
Some of us get delusional and temporarily think that we are the ultimate masters of our own fate. I do... and I find today... that this delusion is a sickness called denial that cuts me off from humility and my humanity. God have mercy on my soul -- Amen.
Madam Guyon decided that she would start an intense relationship with God before she had to go from this life to the next. I am asking myself why am I settling for less?
Currently listening :
Blessed Be Your Name the Songs of Matt Redman, Vol. 1
By Matt Redman
Release date: By 19 July, 2005