Last night was quite the hang out and fellowship time...a good time of conversation, joy, and celebration at Kathy Henry's Apartment... with John Shorack (who is living with his family in Venezuela), Juan Jose, the Ramos family, Nathan B. (who is living and working in Romania), Chris and Roxy and others...

What is striking was the depth of sharing. I will remeber for the rest of my life Dora's recounting hearing in person one of Oscar Romero's last sermons.

I Peter 4:7-11 comes to my mind... Hospitality is part of sustaining the journey of faith together.

We missed another celebration a Wil's house... a first b-day party for a one year old. You all were also in my thoughts...
and so it goes...

This week has been full of non-stop days. Having come back from a week of vacation has helped me realize why I was so tired. It takes humility to slow down. I am learning to share or surrender to other some of the responsibility. Thank you to Wil for setting our annual art accademy for LA Street Productions. Thank you to Rei for organizing our annual cook out... and so it goes... and the reasons for gratitude continues to grow.

Our friend John Shorack is in town. We will be having an open house gathering this evening at Kathy Henry's Appartment.

Back from vacation. Much more prepared for what is up. I have learned to anticipate from the vibe on the streets. Another young man from the neighborhood is gunned down. I did not know him. But one young friend shared with me that he was a close friend... Pray as this will be a turning point for him away from the gang life...

Heat brings the worst out of many. Another friend had his car broken into and his stereo system stolen. (This does not happen a lot in our neighborhood). A different friend suffered in a fight with a person who was once counted as a friend. The Helicopters kept me up until 12:30am last night... more gun fire...

I am a pastor who continues to care for the journey of the souls in my neighborhood. I am a missionary convinced that Jesus wants to teach us a better way to live. I am a street poet and prophet that know that it may get worse before it gets better. There is joy in all circumstances when we realize that life is a gift and it is to be accepted from the hand of God every day. What a privelege it is to do the good that is within our power... What a great privelge it is to do the good that is within God's power to do... Pray that I will walk in the humility necessary to follow in Christ's steps...

I am glad for the time of rest and the work that is ahead of us...

These thoughts came to me as an expansion of some of the thoughts penned by TS Eliot.

Where is the knowledge
lost in the accumulation of information

Where is the Understanding
lost in the accumulation of Knowledge

Where is the Wisdom
lost in the accumulation of Understanding

Where is the Revelation
lost in the accumulation of Wisdom

Where is intimacy with God
Lost to us if we will not start with humility...

our Revelation is partial
our wisdom is lacking
Our understanding is limited
Our knowledge is incomplete
Our information is often flawed

Let us learn to humble ourselves... and grow

jaw1 2003

I am reading an autobiography about Agnes Sanford. I find her to be a very interesting person... who influenced one of my mentors Mrs. Loder. It is also interesting that she was influenced by Morton Kelsey. I am reviewing these influences in my life... and so it goes...

Trust is the most precious asset in relationships. Keep this clearly in view and your love life and friendships will grow and flourish.

I have been thinking about how important inner character is to all of life. We live with ourselves 24 hours a day, 7 days a week, 365 days a year. The deeper our clarity is about how our choices effect who we become on the inside the better off we are in this life. This is at the root St. Peter's concern when he writes II Peter 1:3-11.

Alan Wong as of this last Saturday... is now a Married man. Emily Chang his Lovely Bride. Jude, my mom, Sunday and Kieth drove out to Palis Verdes to witness this event. What was striking was the whole family's love and support for an old missionary woman who had shared her life and faith with the (?) side of the family while in China. It was a Christian wedding with what looked like a lot of intergenerational health in the family. The difference from what usually happens to families that immigrate was striking. Those families testified that God had a lot to do with their collective well being. Not to say that them is perfect or anything. Just that things can and often do better in the context of a living Christian faith. In any case it is the examined life that is worth living.

This Fourth of July was incredible. The fireworks bought and set off by our neighbors were bigger in quantity and size than I remember in previous years. We missed last years fourth in the neighborhood which the neighbors claimed was the best ever. What made this celebration special for us is that my MOM, sister Sunday, and brother-in-law Kieth joined us for this weekend. We were joined by Kathy H., Casandra Carter, Carmen and her family, and others friends and families from the neighborhood. The highlight for me was when my mom got to meet Ozzie's little baby boy and to hear a little of his perspective on the generations coming up. This was an impromptu event... that just came together... I like it when things happen like this.

Jude and I are on vacation. The last vacation we had was about a year ago when my sister Sunday got married to Kieth Herzog. (For them it is a punch Buggy world ever since)... Jude and I are surprised at how tired we are... it is good to get away. House sitting for Jude's brother Peter makes the time away affordable.

I now have the Bible on CD. A great way for me as an oral learner to go through the scriptures.

Sunday and Monday I was sick with a fevor and a sore throat. 2 days in bed proved to be a hidden blessing. A push to think about life... and to think about priorities. I started to read the journal of Francis Asburry again (readign the scriptures that he referrs to... this is my way of getting out of the mold of just reading the passages of scripture that I like). What a passion for souls. I want to live out of that kind of love for people.

This Saturday LA ST. Prod. went once again to Peperdine Universtiy for another day of art instruction with Professor Avery. 10 of us got instruction about color theory and encouragement in learning to mix our own colors. This was our 6th year... We have all grown over the years... and gifts of love and involvement of others in our lives has been priceless.

I have contiued this week with playing lectures by Dr. James Loder. Then spinning KRSONE and his Ablum Spiritual Minded. We need to learn to love God and people and wisely use things, rather than loving things and using people (and even God). Wake Up!!!

Live the Revolution of souls; start with your own.

Transformations
Conversion
Transition
Change
Revolution
A Christ centered life...is like

John the Baptist in the desert
Jesus on the Cross
Peter learning to love three times larger than ever before...

The Apostle John with his visions
The Apostle Paul constantly trying to help others understand...
All this And Visitations of the Holy Spirit that spurs us on to love and good deeds

God’s love reaches for us daily...
We learn to...
Love God first
Love people more than things
And do not be surprised at the confused responses to such a life

You will witness your own transformation
You will stimulate the conversion of others
Life will not stagnate — embrace transitions because living things keep growing
Become the change you hope to see in this world
Continue this Revolution of souls...

Knock, Knock on your hearts door...
God wants to be known as the very source of love itself
Burning inside of you;
--- There is no greater love.

By jaw 2003



Late with the poem for this month...so this will be for next as well...

Started an online journal: Www.jawpoetry.blogspot.com

Love to hear about your own creative endevours.

I am currently at Luna Tierra Sol. Free Internet use for 15 min. adds a lot to this already alternative everything coffee house. I am going to meet Sue here for a follow up meeting to our last conversation... then go out to Laguna to a friends house for my day off which is usually on Wed.

Today I shared with a friend who might be the first person to help fund my dream for a post card company that will encourage the Explicitly Christ Centered reflections currently needed in our culture that explores: "The content and quality of our lives is built on the content and quality of our relationships with God, ourselves, one another and the environment". Now to begin with the steps needed to get this rolling.

Well I am at Kill Radio. I am playing Dr. James Loder (content to feed the soul) and then U2's album The Unforgetable Fire. I need to review What I have learned from Dr. Loder who has passed on from this life. To then embrace what of him I am called to embody.

Sometimes there is a joy to listening to an album all the way through. Today I am spinning The Grits and Barry Taylor. I like the verbal thickness of The Grits. I like Barry's lyrics and tight hooks. Both examine the spiritual journey of our souls.

Roxy has just graduted from Cal State LA and yesterdy we celebrated with family and friends this big step. She did it with class and humility... not forgetting where she came from and pushing for excelence all the way (Graduating with honors in the top 3% of her class). What matters most to me is that she has held on to her capacity to love and care for the children that she is going to work with in the LA school system. I am glad to have her and Chris as friends and partners in this journey called "life" and to have been able to encourage fatih and courage along the way. May God be praised throughout the generations -- Amen!!! (Ephessians 3:14-21).

Joking sometimes has the danger of killing all other conversation if the purpose of communication in a group becomes the immeadiate pleasure of a laugh, the demonstration of wit, or the social pushing for being the top dog and the center of attention. I am curious about our fear of silence... underneath that fear may be that we might not have anything to say. How do we encourage both ourselves and others not to become shallow and at the same time not becoming a kill joy?

Friday
I hung out with Chris A. tonight. We watched the Japanese animation movie Spirited Away and then played some video games for old time sake. The movie is striking because of it's very non-western world view. It is so unlike many hollywood scripts and the animation is incredible.

Saturday
Yard Sale Fund Raiser for LA Street Productions with Wilburd Estrada and family. We raised over $140.00 .

Corrie came to spend the weekend with us to explore the possibility of doing an internship with us in starting this fall.

Went to the VanEngens for dinner and met with them and other friends Mary and Mark, Hal and Nancy.

Sunday

Had breakfast with Jude and Corrie. Talked for about 3 hours.

Two weeks this past Thursday

The LA InnerChange Team Met with Alberto & Clelia. They want to do a church plant in this area and are in a process of getting to know the neighborhood better. Boy and Laura showed up and represented the neighborhood well. At the end Alberto and Clelia asked if we would consider being part of their church planting council.

Thursday
Team breakfast followed by acts devotions where we discussed the first part of the story of Paul getting ship wrecked.

Paul and I went to play racket ball. This is a new healthy pattern for us that I hope to continue through the summer. This means joining the YMCA.

We then came up for the following prayer request for InnerChange LA:

LA INNERCHANGE PRAYER REQUESTS

For more InnerChange workers globally and the Los
Angeles team's historical role in nurturing vision,
training, and launching workers.

For culturally relevant churches for the 1.5
generation (bicultural immigrants).

For the young adults who are emerging as leaders for
the kingdom - for their character development and
ministry skills.

For community development efforts - especially
Comunidad Cambria and LA Street Productions - that
participants overcome their fears and grow in faith,
moving from guardedness to blessing.

For our visioning process - which includes the
possibility of a youth center.

For the people and resources we need to accomplish
God's purposes.

The Source of All Love
Without the love of our parents, sisters, brothers, spouses, lovers, and friends, we cannot live. Without love we die. Still, for many people this love comes in a very broken and limited way. It can be tainted by power plays, jealousy, resentment, vindictiveness, and even abuse. No human love is the perfect love our hearts desire, and sometimes human love is so imperfect that we can hardly recognise it as love.
In order not to be destroyed by the wounds inflicted by that imperfect human love, we must trust that the source of all love is God's unlimited, unconditional, perfect love, and that this love is not far away from us but is the gift of God's Spirit dwelling within us.
by Henri Nouwen

Today I started reading A Grace Disguised: How the Soul Grows Through Loss by Jerry Sittser. The reality of loss, mortality, and death has sunk deep into my soul. There is a call within my soul to grow in my emotional and attitudinal openess and honesty. To be able to speak in the categories of truth is to be able to talk freely and in depth about: life and death, pleasure and pain, hope and despair, evil and resurection... The path of wisdom does not close it's eyes to sorrow nor does it let go of the grattitude that produces joy.

Space is needed to recognize why my soul has needed to learn to walk through sorrow differently. To account for my own sense of losses is in no way to deminish anyone elses joy, nor in any way to compare my loses to others... rather it is to feel... for me to learn to be more human and to offer this human soul to God.

A roll call of friends and losses that I need to acknowledge:

Jose Barajas

My Grandmother: Mrs. Florence Head

Dr. James Loder

Mrs. Sanchez

Carol P.

Jorge E. (Rez's Brother)

Babara Buckland

As you all can tell I write in inspired spurts. I am coming out of a dry spell. There are reasons for the desert times in our lives. For me it is the way God gets my attention when I am not listening to some core reality. Denial is not a river in Egypt or anywhere else for that matter. The desert craves rain and finally in the end nothing else matters. I am taking a Spiritual retreat day... ever so long over due... Perspective is part of my work... I am overdue in taking the time to have, maintain and press for depth of perspective... Love you all...

I have had a frustrating time consistantly connecting with some of the jr. high youth in my neighborhood. I may have discovered a new window of opportunity. Food, friendship and sharing... roots to modeling hospitality... well the last couple of weeks we have gotten together to cook food and share it with our friends, neighbors and family. It is important to have abundance... to have the opportunity to feel how it feels to be able to give rather than to take. To their surprise this is more fun than watching a movie or playing with yugioh cards... and other usual past times. Yesterday one youth was dreaming what it might be like for us to have our own pizza company... work with immeadiate tangible results is also a pluss... moms seem to be happy to have their youth come home happy and not hungry for a change... another youth was musing, "why don't we do this instead of ordering pizza out"... I now have a concrete way for peple to come and volunteer for an evening... come and teach us how to cook your favorite food... is their a Lasagna out there... we are currently a small enough group that we could come to you... and so it goes...

Today I decided to play music from people that I know and count as friends. Prayer does something unique to friendships accross time and space. It ignites a unique kind of love in the heart. I carry a love for those with a creative soul because we live in a world that would homginize and package everything in reality for the consummer market. It is not easy to transcend market forces... in some way all of these artists are trying to do that
1. Track 08 9:10 Wayne Lytle


2. A Thousand Faces 5:48 Beth Meres Tree

3. It is Good 4:47 Beth Meres Tree

*. Larea Screen -- "dot Com + more"

4. Chris Key And Friends 8:50

5. He Don't Mind 4:00 Barry Taylor Love Songs for Underdogs

6. Everytime 4:44 Barry Taylor Love Songs for Underdogs

7. Responsibility 6:42 Ruth Naiomi Floyd Walk and Not Be Faint

8. Path of Life 4:47 Ruth Naomi Floyd With New Eyes

9. Stand to the Glory 3:49 Ruth Naomi Floyd With New Eyes

10. Track 12 4:27 Twisted Region

11. God Nos Llama 3:51 Zehnder Breathing

12. Jesus became a Renegade 4:46 Zehnder Breathing

13. All My Heart 4:28 Zehnder Breathing

14. Living in the Land of Palm Trees 3:26 Zehnder A Broken Train of Thought

15. Snapoe beats#6 3:12

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